Tag Archives: San Francisco

A “Real” Date

I went on a date. And no, it wasn’t an OKCupid date. I actually met the guy in person when he came into the bar for Burning Man Happy Hour on the 4th of July. He’d seen my post about it and we’d corresponded. He was visiting from California. Did New York City have a CORE Project?

He came in with a friend who had his young son in tow. They were drunk…and got drunker, hanging out at the bar all afternoon. I enjoyed their company. He stayed way later than his friend and even after I hurried off to a friend’s rooftop to see the fireworks. I should’ve invited him along.

But he emailed me when he got back home, thanking me for a good time and offering to reciprocate if I’d be passing through California on my way up to Gerlach. He also complimented me: “You are smokin’ hot when you throw the post x 2.” I was flattered. And I responded that yes, indeed, I would be in Marin between NYC and NV.

So when I got to San Rafael I let him know I was local and we made plans. I showed up at his house at 8 and we had a few beers, chatting like mad. We walked into town to see some live music; I don’t think we even looked at the band much less listened to it, but we had a few more beers. Then we strolled back to his place where I drank water. (This being California, I didn’t want to drive too drunk.) He asked if I wanted to spend the night and offered the couch, but I demurred.

As we stood in his driveway, saying goodnight, I wasn’t sure if the date had been a romantic date or a, you know, hang out kinda date. He hugged me goodbye and I think he might’ve tried to give me a kiss but, again, I couldn’t be sure. It has been so long since someone’s been interested in me I couldn’t tell! My flirtometer is broken!

I followed up on our “date” with an effusive thank you, telling him I hadn’t enjoyed the company of another human being quite that much in a very long time! We both said we hoped to see each other out on the playa. And we exchanged camp locations.

Fast forward a few weeks and we both made a few attempts to find each other. I stopped by his camp and asked if he was around. I came home to a note from him in my trailer. I dropped off some stickers I made for him. He asked about me at the DPW Fuel Station. But, sadly, our playa rendezvous was not to be.

So when I moved back into town I emailed him, asking if he wanted to get together before I headed back to Manhattan. He responded almost immediately. Yay, a good sign! So after returning to San Rafael I let him know I was local again. And…nothin’. I was kinda bummed. But then he showed up at the DPW BBQ at SF Decom. Big hug. Good to see you. All that. And then he had to go work. He emailed me later in the evening but I’d already disappeared.

So more days went by and eventually we made plans. I met him at a bar in the city, where he was seeing a friend’s band. We had a few beers and lasted long after the band had left. We wound up wingin’ drink coasters at the bar staff and laughing with a random handful of patrons, eventually bumbling out the door a few moments before 2am. Not wanting the evening to end (I guess) he said we should get something to eat, so I followed him to Grub Stake. After gravy fries (for me) and eggs (for him) we were standing in the street. And this time there was no “almost” or question about whether there was any romance. He went right in for the kiss. And we stood there, making out, with a light rain falling.

So yeah. Not just one real date but TWO real dates. With a real guy. Who I met in real life. Let’s see what happens next! Cause he’s in NYC quite a bit. And I’m often out west. Sooooo…..

West Coast, Sex & Absurdity, Cinco de Drunko

Ack! It’s been days — DAYS! — since I’ve (b)logged on here. I went on a whirlwind trip out west:

Left my apartment last Thursday at 5am, Jamye picked me up at the airport and we hung out at her new place in San Francisco. She drove me to my parents, who took us out for dinner. Friday morning my mom drove me back into the city to drop me off at Mel and Tony’s, who gave me a ride to Gerlach and Black Rock Station. We stopped in Oakland for Anna and Dylan, had lunch in Auburn and pulled into Gerlach around 5 for drinks at Bev’s Miners Club. By the time we got to the Ranch it was getting dark. I threw my sleeping bags into one of the metal condos, set out Scribble’s food and water and the drinking commenced. It sure was great to be sitting around a burn barrel again!

Woke up super early Saturday morning, still on east coast time. Enjoyed my coffee beside the burn barrel before breakfast and our DPW Managers’ Meeting, which only lasted till lunch time! Soooo, yup, you got it, the drinking commenced! I managed to stay sober enough to conduct my contract and budget meeting and taste our delicious dinner! By the time 10pm rolled around I had to roll myself into bed!

Such an early bedtime meant another early rise and more coffee around the burn barrel. Monte Christos for breakfast were followed by goodbyes and a quick stop in Gerlach so Hayseed could check out some real estate. We drove three young Eastern Europeans into Reno; they’d rolled their car on the playa. Then it was on to Sacramento for dinner with Vaughn and Dawn. By the time I’d dropped Hayseed in Oakland I was too exhausted to attend Fuckin’ Andy’s going away party, opting to head to San Rafael for the rest I knew I’d need for Monday. Sunburned, windburned and exhausted!

Monday morning I had coffee with my mom, then drove into the city for a massage with Franny. Mmm, that was awesome! I hurried to meet my sister and niece for lunch and hung with them all afternoon. My parents came in for a full family dinner before I had to rush downtown to the Center for Sex and Culture and my wacky “Sex & Absurdity” event. It got off to an awkward start but turned out awesome in the end! Anna ran the door, Ace was our DJ and sound guy and the talented link-up featured Miss Roach, Dr. Notorious and Princess Cream Pie, Laika Fox, Austintatious, Tizzy Walls, MegaFlame, Fudgie Frottage and yours truly. The audience was enthusiastic and receptive and everyone had a blast! A few of us bumbled off for after show beverages and I didn’t crawl into bed till after 1am.

Tuesday was spent almost entirely in transit and man, was I happy to get home to my comfy bed and black-out curtains! I’ve spent the past few days catching up and working, picking up an extra shift on Thursday. Cinco de Mayo was amazing, celebrating Don and Natasha’s birthdays at the bar and working in my Frida Kahlo drag. Now I’m preparing for a slew of out of town visitors, Night of a Thousand Stevies, Ace’s NYC birthday juggernaut, the Black & Light Ball and more! I have a million ideas to blog about, just not enough bandwidth to actually concentrate. Soon, soon… Maybe I need to move to a remote mountain top!

Random Thoughts

I got home last night. And not a moment too soon! I have many ideas percolating and loads of things to accomplish, including taking down my Christmas tree. For now, some random thoughts:

San Francisco…
• The perfect place for sparkly old broads.
• So much sun and blue sky it makes me want to smack someone.
• Totally overrun by self-righteous bicyclists. One guy was weaving down Valencia Street, at night, no light, practically taunting me to run him down. Dude, bike vs. car? Car wins! Idiot. Use the fucking bike lane. And get a light! Grrr….
• Having to DRIVE everywhere is literally a buzzkill. Even within the city, it’s difficult not to drink and drive. Cabs are impossible to find (most places) and when you call them, sometimes they don’t even show up. Parking is so hard to find (also, most places) it makes having a (somewhat necessary) car even more inconvenient. Making me SO glad to be living in NYC!

How did my bank account balance get so low? And why the hell did my bank decide to start charging me $10 a month if my balance falls below $1500? Again, the poor get penalized… I am literally overcome by my bills. I owe thousands of dollars that I simply don’t have. It sure would be great to get ahead. Or at least be breaking even.

Family can be really depressing. If you have friends who are negative or otherwise bring you down, you can phase them out of your life. Though I suppose the same could be said for family, it isn’t quite as easy or even a viable long-term solution. My mom can be so difficult to spend time with. All she talks about is my sister’s divorce — or my cousin’s. Doom and goddamn gloom.

I made name stickers for my sister’s kids in Sign Shop and she actually put them on the kids’ doors! In her brand new, freshly renovated million dollar Presidio Heights home! AWESOME!

I’m really grateful for my health. And even more happy that I don’t suffer from insomnia! Not being able to sleep sounds miserable. My bed is so comfortable, my plushy Cashmina sheets are so snuggly and my adorable dog is such good company, I love going to bed! And I’ve felt blissfully sleepy doing so recently. Mmm!

My two most recent emails on OKCupid? Hilarious!

hello sweet mature tall thunder ! [Tal]l thunder? That’s almost as awesome as “really shiny”!!!]
your smile is a refreshing breeze and made me soft . [Uh, SOFT? I don’t think “soft” is a good thing…]
would like to know you a little more if its ok for you ……… 
wish you a week as lovely as your irresistable smile ! 
regards from istanbul [Istanbul? Not Constantinople? Isn’t that, like, the definition of “geographically undesirable”?]

sexy body… love the pics. you seem to be a free spirit. would love to hookup 🙂

Awesome. Except this guy is 29 years old. Sigh. And a recent “interests” segment on a SeniorPeopleMeet profile: my grand kids my kids also fishing. Yup, he sounds like a real laugh riot!

Okay, back soon with something more substantial…

San Frandipity

So I’m at this bar with my sister (a bar called Absinthe which, oddly, didn’t carry any brands of absinthe I recognized) and I’m crying because, well, because I’m with my sister and…oh hell, lemme just get on with the story! We start chatting with the guy next to us, or more accurately my sister starts talking to the guy next to her. We’re having a lovely conversation and I show him my new tattoo (I can’t recall why I did that, now that I think about it…total non sequitur…anyway!) and I’m about to really spill the whole feather history but instead I just say, “I found this,” and pull on my silver feather necklace.

“I found this ring,” he tells us, pulling it off his finger, “when I was riding my bike in the Mission,” and he hands me the ring. I take one look at it and say, “My friend made that ring.” He didn’t seem too impressed and slid it back onto his hand. Meanwhile, I am busy Googling my friend, Anne Arden McDonald (though I don’t know why I just didn’t type in anneardenmcdonald.com, since that’s obviously gonna be her web site) and I see the link for her Etsy page. Click, scroll and, voila! A photo of the ring this guy is wearing. I flash my gizmo at him and then he’s impressed. “You’re freakin’ me out!” he exclaims. I’m freakin’ myself out. I know it’s a small world and it seems smaller every day, so I won’t even ask “what are the chances?” Cause what were the chances that someone would randomly find my lost earring, two years later, out in the middle of the dust? Shit happens…really weird shit, even.

He went on to tell me that he’d visited a psychic, who told him that a very talented woman jeweler made the ring and that she wanted him to have it. I’ll have to ask her! I’m still waiting for someone to spot my silver feather and say they know who made it, or where it came from. Within this small world I inhabit, the chances of that happening are pretty damn good.

Now I’m in a strange house. In San Francisco. Yes, again. And no, I haven’t told any of my friends that I’m here…I’m supposed to be keeping my sister company. We’ll see how that works out. She’s in a parking lot somewhere, breaking things. Don’t even ask. Why does being here make me cry?

Well, good night….

No Love at Buffalo Exchange

In a season when everyone could use a few extra bucks for their holiday shopping, I attempted to sell a few pieces of vintage clothing  at my local Buffalo Exchange the other day. I got NO LOVE. I hate to sound paranoid but I’m gonna blame it on my age, because that gay guy working there takes ONE LOOK at me and immediately thinks, “No way could THIS old hag have anything WE would want to buy!” It has happened to me on BOTH coasts, here in the East Village and in San Francisco on Haight Street. It could also be that I don’t wear a size 6… But if you’ve ever tried to FIND size 12 clothes in a thrift shop you’d sure welcome a few things that you might actually fit into.

I have, literally, hundreds of items that came from amazing thrift stores, antique shops, costume sales and fancy-ass department stores. I have an entire storage space crammed with these clothes. Occasionally I feel like I’d rather have a few extra bucks than one or two pieces of vintage clothing or exotic costumes. Most recently I steamed and hung up a pair of black satin pants (Limited) and a pair of black sequin pants, both pajama style (a style, btw, that never goes OUT of style…hit the shops any year, every year, and you’ll find this cut…as it is a classic). I also brought a cute 50s/60s Jackie O.-type wool jacket with custom buttons and a fur collar. I purchased the jacket at a thrift shop and sewed on the new buttons myself back in the 80s. It is obviously not a “current” style but it IS a vintage item. I also brought a long a clingy peach sequin tank top and a beautiful see-through black tunic blouse, long-sleeved, with beading. I spent over $100 for it, again, back in the 80s. I’ve recently seen similar shirts at Nordstrom Rack and H&M.

This guy wanted nothing. NOTHING. I was kinda shocked. Every piece is something that you could wear to a holiday party (I went in on the 2nd of December) and all the pieces are timeless. No, not something you’d buy and it would go out of style in moments. So it isn’t “in style” today and then garbage next month. These are items you could wear this year, next year or 20 years from now. Well, provided we aren’t all wearing space suits or whatever else fashion magazines love to “predict” we’ll be wearing in the “future.”

When he told me they were items that “wouldn’t sell at this time” I asked, “Aren’t people shopping for holiday parties?” He sneered, “Well, these are all old styles.” Yeah, for OLD PEOPLE. Like me, I guess. Bah! If anyone on here knows a GOOD place to take unusual clothes and not the crap they sell at American Apparel, please let me know. I could use a few extra bucks! Maybe I should try their Chelsea locations, where drag queens might be shopping…