Tag Archives: fomo

This Explains a Lot

First, lemme say: Laissez Les Bon Temps Rouler! I am FOMOing like mad about not down in New Orleans, strolling from the Marigny to the Quarter in the Parade of St. Anne. So many friends down there! Bah.

Second, my biggest reason for not being down there: this bar! And yes, progress is being made. Though it is seriously trying my patience! I’m gonna go say farewell to one of my favorite bars today: Ninth Ward. It is a New Orleans-themed bar with cute little banquettes with curtains you can close and a real wood-burning fireplace. SUCH a shame they are closing. Ugh.

Also causing me some FOMO? So many friends in Barcelona! This past weekend was the Euro Regional Burning Man Summit (or whatever they call it) and this coming weekend is the big birthday bash for my Sign Shop cohort, Jedi. My big reason for not being there? Small Claims Court Monday. Double ugh.

So aside from freaking out about the glacial pace of this bar biz, I’m cursing Facebook as shots of my pals scroll by in other, more enticing places. With over a dozen windows open in my browser (How to Make Bitters! Custom Pint Glasses!) one more window that’s featured in my attempt at distracting myself is 16Personalities. For anyone who’s seen the alphabet soup on dating profiles and doesn’t know what they mean, the 16 personalities classifications are a combination of Jungian psychology and the Myers-Briggs test, with modern influences. Read their web site for a far more in-depth explanation.

And what is it that I fell “explains everything”? I tested out as “The Debater”:

The ENTP personality type is the ultimate devil’s advocate, thriving on the process of shredding arguments and beliefs and letting the ribbons drift in the wind for all to see. Unlike their more determined Judging (J) counterparts, ENTPs don’t do this because they are trying to achieve some deeper purpose or strategic goal, but for the simple reason that it’s fun. No one loves the process of mental sparring more than ENTPs, as it gives them a chance to exercise their effortlessly quick wit, broad accumulated knowledge base, and capacity for connecting disparate ideas to prove their points.

There are pages and pages describing each personality and all of mine seriously spoke to me. Since I can remember, my parents have said, “You’d argue with the Lord.” I probably should’ve been a lawyer. Here’s what it says about us ENTPs as “subordinates”:

This dynamic is clearest with ENTP subordinates, as they are comfortable challenging their managers’ ideas and have a strong (and well-expressed) dislike for restrictive rules and guidelines. ENTPs back this unorthodox behavior with their keen minds and curiosity, and are as capable of adopting new methods as they are of suggesting others do so. If something can be done better, it’s as simple as that, and ENTP personalities gladly take criticism, so long as it’s logical and performance-oriented.

I’m sure if you asked any of the managers at jobs where I was fired or “laid off,” they would agree. Their inflexibility translated to my being “unhappy in my job.” That could never have been further from the truth. I loved just about all my jobs. But loving my job and still believing there was room for improvement — in everything! — was interpreted by my managers as my misery. So weird. Thank heavens for Burning Man and DPW (and Tony!) for recognizing the true me!

Some readers might balk at the passage of my ability to “gladly take criticism.” I wish they could all be in the room when my friend Marianne calls me on my shit. She does it so succinctly that I can’t even respond. I just nod. Though the two of us have certainly engaged in plenty of (almost 30 years!) of critical banter.

Anyway, have fun today! Happy Mardi Gras!


Content? Or Malcontent?

Why is the number one search that brings people to my blog “vaginal massage?” I’ve written about a lot of things (over and over and over) but have only mentioned “vaginal massage” once. Sheesh!

This past week was (obviously) another one spent avoiding the computer and suffering from some serious FOMO (fear of missing out). There was just so much going on! On Saturday alone there was the Dance Parade, Brooklyn’s Great Googa Mooga, the big punk bash Black & Blue Bowl, Electric Daisy Carnival out at the Meadowlands, Joey Ramone’s Birthday Party, Love That Fever, blahblahblah.

The EDC lasted from Friday till Sunday and I got to see at least a little peek of it, helping to wrangle balloons again with the Balloon Chain. Our wristbands got us free food and free carnival rides. Wheee! Loved the spiral slide, the barfy swings and The Zipper! Got to see the Spire of Fire, all the way from Reno and tended to by DPW, FLG and more! Of course, the music wasn’t exactly my thing but it sure was fun to see the furry, dayglo raver kids. And on Sunday I rode the subway up to the Bronx for Winkel & Balktick’s “Flappers & Philosophers,” an afternoon lawn party a la F. Scott Fitzgerald. People were really dressed up! It felt like we’d stepped back in time.

But yeah, I’ve been avoiding the computer. I simply haven’t felt inspired lately. Writing about my miserable dating life (or lack thereof) has just become kinda boring. And somewhat depressing. I don’t feel motivated to write about “happy” stuff because no one seems to enjoy reading it. And of course I’ve been struggling with how “happy” can I be while still trying to change my current situation. Can I be content and discontent simultaneously?

I don’t know. Maybe it’s my impending birthday. Another year older and no closer to…whatever it is I’ve been striving for. Or have I had that my whole life? And yet I keep tricking myself into believing I “need” something…else? Whatever. In a few months (60 days, to be exact) I’ll be back in tiny little Gerlach with a job to do, a crew to manage and a whole lotta beer to drink. I kinda can’t wait.