Monthly Archives: January 2011

Off On Another Adventure

So I’m leaving today on a trip to Alaska. Yes, Alaska. In the winter.

I met a guy on OkCupid (hi Andy!) and we realized early on that we’d be better as friends. We’ve hung out and gotten to know each other. He lived in Alaska for 14 years and wanted to go up there to celebrate his birthday. He misses it, I guess. Well, he mostly misses his favorite strip club, The Great Alaskan Bush Company. Anyway, he asked me if I’d want to go to with him. I’m sure that it’s partly because I’m probably one of the few women he would feel comfortable taking to a strip club. (And I’m sure he’ll correct me if I’m wrong!) I still miss Billy’s Topless. It’s probably also that I’m the kind of person who never says no to an adventure!

So in a few hours I’ll be flying to Seattle and connecting to my flight to Anchorage. I’ll be spending a few days there but we’ll also be flying up to Fairbanks and driving to Chena Hot Springs, where I’m hoping we’ll be able to see The Northern Lights. Seeing the Aurora Borealis is pretty much the only thing on my “bucket list.” Fingers crossed! So stay tuned!

Idiotarod 2011

Yesterday I was an anonymous member of Corporation X. As a conglomerate, we “ran” the Idiotarod. Actually, a bunch of people in wacky costumes did the running. We just provided the bureaucracy. (Heh, I just mistyped that as bureaucrazy, which was probably more fitting!)

Teams met up at 10:30am in Maria Hernandez Park. The mounds of snow provided a scenic backdrop to the colorful costumes: bumble bees, pastel papier maché monsters, techno Vikings, Mardi Gras jesters and more. We corporate whores were dressed in professional attire, basic black, white shirts with black ties and dark ski masks marked with our logo, a white X. All employees of Corporation X also sported Henry McGovern name tags.

We strolled around, shaking people down for bribes. The Mardi Gras folks had Hurricanes and beads, the Disasterpiece people had Jell-O shots and someone handed me a brownie! I was also asking participants to pose for group shots. Everyone looked awesome!

The competition began when racers were given their first destination, and we piled into a car, headed for our checkpoint, “Meg,” a bar somewhere in Brooklyn. The purpose of checkpoints, beyond the obvious, is to slow people down and generally fuck with them. We took our jobs very seriously and provided enough corporate red tape to frustrate, confuse and delay.

Ruth and I were in charge of “The Rat Race,” basically creating workplace-type irritation. I instructed racers to “Run to the other end of the bar and brown nose.” When they didn’t quite grasp that, I got more specific. “Go to the other end of the bar, find the right Henry McGovern, and come back with a brown nose.” Ruth was the right Henry and she had chocolate frosting to smear on everyone’s noses. We made them run back and forth with boxes, too, but the best part was making them get on their knees and beg for their jobs. Listening to a bunch of people groveling made me feel surprisingly good! I was drunk with power! And alcohol…

The checkpoints are also an opportunity for races to rest, warm up and have a drink or two. When upper management showed to let us know that maybe people were doing a little too much resting and not enough racing, we wrapped up our operation and headed to the last stop. More drinking ensued before we all headed to the afterparty. By that point I was so drunk I didn’t know where the hell I was. And when things started getting blurry, I jumped into a cab with one or the Black Swans (er, he was a White Swan…) and came home. I think that cab ride cost me way more than it should have but it was definitely better than the subway ride would’ve been. I had a blast!

Going Negative?

Dating isn’t as easy once you hit 40. Or 50. Hell, nothing’s as easy. Accepting that you’re less than thrilled about being single — which is why we put ourselves through the dating process and subject ourselves to singles’ events — can feel like admitting a deficiency, something we should all be used to by now but that never gets any easier.

Chances are pretty good that anyone who is, let’s say, over 45 has been through the ringer. A few times. Whether that ringer is a failed marriage or just a failed relationship (or two…or three), it has probably hardened them in some way. We are a sum of our experiences and if there have been disappointments, it can be tough to separate our identities from those disappointments, to talk ourselves into feeling like winners when we feel more like losers. Eventually our failures can overwhelm us. Life, in general, may be weighing us down, of accumulating on us.

In addition to all the other crap that comes along with getting older, consider laying your ass on the line with a stranger — or a whole sequence of strangers — in search of elusive true love. It’s enough to make someone become a hermit. Or at least throw in the towel. But if you’re desperately resisting slipping into pessimism, if you’re one of the people bucking hermit-tude, and you’re dabbling in dating in your fourth or fifth decade, you’ve probably dragged along a good deal of baggage with you. I know it’s difficult to check that baggage. But if you don’t, you might be better off on your couch.

Many of the men I’ve met lately, either as potential dates or merely fellow singletons, have struck me as being somewhat sad sack. It isn’t a good look. I can’t say I blame them for being unable to put on a positive face. I’ve been finding it difficult to be positive myself.

One gentleman was an OkCupid date and we met for a beer. Somehow we started talking about his divorce and the conversation sort of spiraled downward. It’s tough to keep things happy and positive when you’re discussing custody battles or who’s to blame for the end of the relationship. I wound up wallowing a bit myself. Even when I attempted to lighten things up, the pall had already been cast. I eventually wrote to the guy and apologized for a not-so-great date and gently suggested that perhaps he wasn’t quite ready to enter the shark tank of dating quite yet. He never responded.

Another instance, another OkCupid dude: After chatting on the phone a while, he suggested that we meet at a wine bar. Never mind that it says right on my profile that I hate wine. I was willing to overlook his disregard as an indication of nervousness. But when we met, he hardly said a word. I do believe one of his utterances was along the lines of “I’m probably not exciting enough for you.” Even though that was, in fact, totally true and incredibly obvious, it didn’t mean I couldn’t enjoy his company, there, in that moment. Why did he need to sabotage himself?

And then there’s the sad sack who just can’t seem to crack a smile. A recent acquaintance at a recent event seemed like a totally cool guy. For a few moments I managed to engage him in something that excited him. But he spent most of the evening with a long face. I don’t think he was miserable; he could’ve left at any point. He just looked…beaten down by life. It’s tough to explain. I think maybe he could’ve used a pep talk…or some sort of ego boost!

At least these men are putting themselves out there. They haven’t given up or abandoned their sense of optimism. They haven’t completely succumbed to staying at home…alone. However, sometimes they aren’t necessarily doing themselves a service. They certainly didn’t get a second date.

So what to do to avoid coming across like a sad sack? If you aren’t feeling particularly social, it might be a good idea to stay home, because the you you’ll be putting out there won’t be the best. If there’s something you aren’t comfortable with — your weight, your employment status, even your wardrobe — fix it before you enter the fray. Sharing your insecurities once you’ve established a relationship can be endearing; sounding less than confident on that initial encounter, not so much. Keep whatever conversations you start as upbeat as you’re capable of. Don’t discuss your divorce, your dreaded ex or your crappy day at the office — if you still have an office. No need to keep all the ugly stuff a secret; just do your best not to dwell on it.

Well those are a few gentle suggestions. I have plenty more to say about how to show up for a date or at an event, so stay tuned!

Unique Theater Experience to Debut in West Chelsea

I wrote this for NearSay.com. Love them!

NearSay has just gotten word about an exciting new theatrical experience that will soon be taking place in West Chelsea. New York City-based production company, Emursive, is bringing the internationally acclaimed theatre team Punchdrunk’s premiere show, ‘Sleep No More’ to the Big Apple. Opening night is March 7th, 2011.

Their press release reveals a few tantalizing hints: “A legendary hotel… Shakespeare’s fallen hero… A film noir shadow of suspense… Punchdrunk’s ‘Sleep No More’ is an award-winning theatrical experience that tells Shakespeare’s classic tragedy.”

I was fortunate to be among a group that was given a preview tour of the recently re-appointed space. Formerly Twilo and Spirit nightclubs, as well as psychedelic artist Alex Grey‘s Chapel of Sacred Mirrors, over 300 into artisans have totally transformed the six-floor venue into “The McKittrick Hotel.” More than 100 rooms will amuse and confuse theatre guests, including a hotel lobby, lounges that will serve alcohol, trompe l’oeil extravagances and many other impressive feats of set-building. The sweeping installation is nothing short of incredible.

More from their press release that I can’t explain better myself: “Since 2000, Punchdrunk has pioneered a game-changing form of immersive theatre in which roaming audiences experience epic storytelling inside sensory theatrical worlds. The company’s infectious format rejects the passive obedience usually expected of audiences.”

In other words, the experience will be unlike anything you’ve ever attended on Broadway – or any other theatre. “Free to encounter the installed environment in an individual, imaginative journey, the choice of what to watch and where to go is theirs alone,” the producers invite you, adding that “audience members are encouraged to move freely through the epic world of the story at their own pace, choosing where to go and what to see.” This free-form format ensures that “everyone’s journey will be unique.” Guests wishing to view the entire production may need to return a number times or more and take a different route each visit. And perhaps even better than presenting a new and unique way to enjoy theater, the show will employ potentially dozens of actors!

Book in advance and be the first among your friends to experience all the surprises! Tickets and more information about the show can be found at their web site. And for more information about Punchdrunk theatre company:www.punchdrunk.org.uk.

Sleep No More
The McKittrick Hotel
530 West 27th Street

 

Win the FUTURE!

I watched President Obama’s State of the Union speech last night. Not because I’m interested in politics; I couldn’t care less. I don’t have cable and it was on every channel that I am magically able to receive through the airwaves.  (Yeah, I know, it’s like living in the Third World!) One phrase that he kept repeating, in various contexts, was “winning the future.” Since when did the future become a carnival game? Is it really something that can be “won?”

I get what he was trying to say but it reminded me of the current trend to use “WIN!” as a general positive exclamation or in regards to things that can’t, in general, be “won.” To win something there needs to either be a competition or an actual prize. You can’t just randomly win something. Life, for example, cannot be won or lost. No one gets sent home from life with a blue ribbon or a consolation prize; you just get to die, regardless of how awesome your life was. You can’t win at a day or a date or a holiday or an experience. You can enjoy it. It can be a success. It can even be super awesome! But unless you set some parameters beforehand with at least one other person — ie., “Whoever gets laid wins happy hour!” or “Whoever spends the most money wins the shopaholic prize!” — there really aren’t any winners.

You’re more than welcome to believe you’re a winner. Or a loser, if that’s your preference. You can win at chess and lose at checkers, you can excel at one thing and be less than excellent at something else. But you can’t win the future. And if you do manage to win the future, maybe you can win another one and trade up for the past!

“BioChemistry” Party Debuts Friday, January 28th

In support of Chemistry‘s mission of “Illuminated Eroticism,” event producers Sheila and Kenny are proud to announce the premiere of their “sensual, sophisticated party celebrating bisexual and bi-curious men, and the women who love them;” ladies and gentlemen, BioChemistry! If that intriguing new angle on their erotic soirees isn’t exciting enough, the BioChemistry debut will be in a gorgeous Manhattan loft.

For the past five years, the kinky couple have been co-hosting their bi-monthly Chemistry parties in a slightly off-the-beaten-path Brooklyn location. Being the borough snob that I am, it was often difficult to make the trek, so their move to Manhattan is most welcome!

The Chemistry parties are private events for members only. So how does one become a member? It’s really just a matter of registering. There is a screening process that may seem somewhat onerous at first but, believe me, it’s worth your time. Members’ collective commitment to creating a sensual ambience ensures the events success. In their quest to “change the paradigm for modern relationships,” – a lofty goal, indeed – Kenny and Sheila utilize a selective alchemy to guarantee a good time. The break-outs of “singles,” “casually dating couples” or “friends with benefits” also contribute to the calculated balance.

Augmenting the sexually charged atmosphere, DJ $mall¢hange will be spinning the evening’s sensual soundtrack. Little Miss Lusty and Peter Peter will provide the eye candy with a bawdy burlesque performance. Salil the Sexual Magician enters with his magnificent and amazing feats. The Transformational Warriors’ tantric massage will help you forget all about your work week. Become a walking work of art with Irina’s alluring body painting. Work yourself into a lather with seductive Acroyoga by Intimate Evolution. And to tantalize your taste buds, enjoy complimentary champagne from 9 to 10 p.m. and gourmet hors d’oeuvres by Janna.

When word went out to existing members and friends there was an overwhelming response and the sexy guest list is filling up fast! Don’t miss out on your chance to say you were there to experience the big opening night! Ticket sales will be limited to 100 guests and advanced sales close on Wednesday evening, January 26, and the cover charge is based on membership. If tickets are still available at the door they will, of course, cost more. And if, at first blush, this particular soiree doesn’t sound like it’s for you, yet your interest has been piqued, I recommend you visit their website for other events. They’re working on a night of fun in Philadelphia, a lighter look at S&M and, hopefully, more lust in Manhattan lofts.

BioChemistry
Friday, January 28
Doors at 9:00
Midtown Venue to be disclosed upon confirmed registration.
Cover varies upon membership.
Purchase tickets and read more at www.chemistry-nyc.com.

 

Alchemy, Algorithms and Leather Pants

I hosted my second singles’ mixer last night and thought it went pretty well! There was an almost even balance between men and women, new and familiar faces, and a pleasant blend of ages. In my introduction, I assured them all that by merely being in the room they were already being proactive in manifesting their desires. Yeah, new agey blah-blah-blah….but true!

I invited Shanti and Arjuna, The Transformational Warriors, to be my special surprise guests. It was nice to offer an activity and give everyone something to think about other then their next drink. They led the group in a number of eye-opening interactive games and I was sincerely impressed by how willing people were to communicate.

As my soirees grow — and I hope they do! — I may need to “segment” people out into different areas of interest. I spoke with a few of last night’s guests about a vague “leather pants vs. never-leather pants” sort of thing, meaning inviting people who would leather pants to one event and people who never would to another. I realize it seems arbitrary, but there does need to be a certain amount of “curating.” Perhaps separating the sober folks from the tipplers might be advisable as well. There are as many things that make people unsuitable for one another as there are that make them suitable, I suppose!

I hope I am able to eventually create my own palate of “algorithms.” I’m sure every profitable matchmaker uses some sort of magical alchemy to determine who might vibe with whom…Just gathering an interesting group together with the intention of meeting new people is a good start!

Smile!

I’m having an increasingly difficult time being pleasant to people. I can’t figure out why. I was never a patient person to begin with and I’ve never “suffered fools gladly.” But now things seem to be really bad, indicating that my fear/fantasy of becoming a hermit might eventually manifest.

Last night I worked the door at a friend’s event. If the party doesn’t have “greeters,” beyond initial security the door person is an attendee’s first experience of the event. It goes without saying: that encounter should be a friendly, positive one. I was literally struggling to maintain a smile on my face.

The list of inanities that humans spew forth is endless and it’s not like I haven’t heard them all in the past, while still managing to conceal my contempt. It seems that now, however, even when people attempt to exchange pleasantries they annoy the living shit out of me. Hmm, was I always a closet misanthrope?

There were, of course, moments of complete stupidity. “Is there coat check?” a few folks asked. I wanted to say, “Coat check? No! Those two rolling racks of hangers behind me are an art installation!” Instead I summoned up a grin and pointed behind me, “Yes, coat check is right here.” And regardless of how clearly my co-door person instructed people to “line up to the right to pay” before they offered her their hands for stamping, people insisted upon handing their money to her or standing in the way, totally obstructing the process. It wasn’t an overly complicated system.

My favorite instance of idiocy was the group of four who cheerfully paid the cover only to return moments later, asking if this was the “End of the World Party.” I showed them the handbill with the evening’s line-up and, sure enough, it wasn’t the party they were looking for. My sympathy for their ignorance was deep enough for me to cheerfully refund their money. Mind you, this event was on a dark, semi-industrial block of Crown Heights, not a neighborhood chock full of nightclubs. How they found themselves at our door — and subsequently inside our event — was totally beyond me.

Anyway, I did enjoy myself, seeing a few people I hadn’t seen in a while, hanging out with my co-door person, Corinne, and munching on the chocolate covered pretzels provided backstage. The best thing about working the door is it’s easy to say hello without having to engage in any long-winded conversations. So it was a fun night out and I didn’t, technically, need to socialize!

WTF Cupid: Potential Sexist Stalker

So! I’ve been slooooowly learning that communicating with men online who haven’t posted a photo is an exercise in futility. Yet I often blindly stumble along. Recently I had an exchange with one man and after scheduling a meeting “just to be friends” or whatever, I politely backed out, thinking what was the point? I have plenty of friends and this guy didn’t seem to have much in common with me anyway. Even in an effort to “expand my horizons” and perhaps meet “the one” (in a long series of “the ones”), it would likely be a waste of time, both mine and his. Then, as I decided to write about this guy here, I did a quick little Gmail search for him and — CREEPY! — found an email exchange from the same address dating back to 2008. It appears we struck up an OkCupid conversation years ago and…it began — without his photo — and ended exactly the same way. Which leaves me wondering, why do these men bother? It feels somewhat like stalking to me…

(No subject)
Dec. 29, 2010 – 12:55am
happy to send photo once I get my computer and I photo back from apple in a few days…I’m a quiet artist looking for a woman who would eventually – like soon!- move into a house out of view of other houses- I love quiet getting away from distraction and noise and lack of privacy in ny – we’re very different, but I’m honest, not trolling to score sex which is what a high % of men do here and everywhere- it strikes me that you might be in a transitional phase and a more opposite kind of nature would lead you to what you deeply want, minus all the hooplah and people who aren’t there the next day.. I think it is difficult to have a zany life with another zany man, but anything is possible
45% Enemy 50% Friend 60% Match

Dec. 29, 2010 – 6:47pm
Hello,
That’s a pretty interesting offer. I AM, indeed, in a transitional phase. I can’t say that I’m ready to move this minute…or even in the next few months. I can’t say WHAT I’m ready for, to be honest! But I would be open to meeting, just to see if we even get along! You’ve definitely piqued my interest!
Abby
Dec. 29, 2010 – 10:05pm
that’s sweet, an exclamation mark! so quintessentially female, like xoxoxo, only females do that
also honest (another uncommon female trait) :you don’t know what you want— ram dass said if yiou don’t know what to do, just stay in the “I don’t know” mode until you do know, don’t push it
anyway, I would give you my better email address but the apple store still has not returned my computer- so call me if you like at 212 555 1234 or – actually you could email more at XXXXXX@rcn.com
I heard in a documentary that basically the world came within 5 minutes of coming to an end, except maybe people in new zealand- some space probe of the U.S. exploring the northern lights looked like incoming missiles and boris yeltsin was advised to respond militarily- he had all of five minutes- he did not follow protocol and so the U.S. and Russia were saved, he just didn’t think it was real, the meaning of which is that we are living on a thread and need to live life now, like take nothing for granted, that’s my take
no question, I have an interesting mind, but all I want to do is live in a house out of view of other houses and write and paint and be with a kindly, spiritual woman- maybe have a large dog, all gemutlicht (do you know that word? means of hearth and home)- I’m very adept socially, but don’t have much of a desire to be with a lot of them a lot of the time, as shlomo once said the greatest tragedy of the human race is that it is human
I have no energy or interest socially, however it is true that that is thte only way to meet wonderful people, but if you had four or five such people let’s say 10 or 12, plus a partner, you would be overwhelmed…I could disappear with one person, be deeply in love with her and vice versa and never see much of anyone for weeks probably, that plus art and writing– and maybe the dog!
david

Our exchanges moved from OkCupid to regular email:

Re:
thanks…you are forthright and open, the best women are, the kind men like to stay with for life…women tend not to realize that all their minute  mood changes, unreliability and unpredictability and inexplicableness and frequent “disappearances”, then “reappearances” lose men, just as it begins to dawn on men that loutishness and swaggering and unbroken self involvement- and much worse- doesn’t gain them any love- men are far worse: millennia of violence and cruelty and killing: theirs is a stange legacy: the greatest achievements and contributions ever alongside all the extreme horror they’ve perpetrated
62% may be true: the problem is that people can’t be placed, instantly and in reality, like with a snap of the fingers, into a brand new physical circumstance: the zany party girl adjusts, strangely, to being in the kitchen and looking out past the flower box at trees, all her “friends” left behind or a man adjusts to an enlarged social life
anyway, I have yielded to my piscean nature and lead a more than precarious artist’s life. Monet said he was only good at painting and gardening, I would say something similar (not gardening for the second) it’s all I care to do anymore, it’s all I love to do: to think I was for 20 years or so a newspaper reporter, glamorized by the news and today- for well over 10 years, I have not had a working TV and if someone hands me a free paper in the street I take it out of kindness, then drop it in the trash unread. I really can’t stand the news, instead I do art most related to color field, early minimalism of fifties and early sixties. This chinese woman said she would connect my work with wealthy asian collector friends but as women are wont to do, kind of flaked out, it seems, hard to say
so it seems poignant, meeting, I’m lost in dreams of (after decades of growing up in and living in the city)… dreams of a secluded house and total quiet and non distraction and a loving partner- certainly removal from this 440 unit place I live in on the park, everything in tumult and noise, years long terrace and facade work, followed by more carpeting and probably elevator work with people buying and selling and real estate brokers in and out and contractors all over the place and sirens from ambulances day and even night, a gut renovation over my head, a man moving into the apt adjoining my bedroom (he’s very quiet, so far), the only good time really being the middle of the night …my prospects economically are, well…I’m sweet and handsome and tender and kindly  and faithful, but I’ve drifted into art and amd happier in fiction than engaging much with the human race… the “perfect” man but lost in dreamy, financially unproductive preoccupations

Hello David,
I appreciate all the little windows into your life and psyche. I will refrain from using any exclamation marks, as I don’t want to fit into anyone’s clichéd niche.
If you would like to get together, face to face, and see if we even get along, that would be swell. We only register a 62% match, which isn’t very high, comparatively speaking.
I will be back in the city late tonight. My schedule is pretty open.
Abby

abby,
how about tea/coffee/any warm soothing liquid next week?
somewhere near where you are so it’a easy for you
D
Hi David,
That sounds delightful! (Oops, another one of those damn exclamation points! OH NO! I CAN’T STOP!)
Heh.
I live in the East Village. There are dozens of coffee shops, tea
shops and similarly cozy establishments. I recently discovered “Think”
on Lafayette between 12th and 13th near Union Square. It has a huge
selection of warm beverages and lots of room to hang out. Or we could
do more of a restaurant. Or somewhere more intimate… Any day besides
Wednesday would work for me!
A
also, only females sign xoxo
they have the right idea, hugs and kisses (actually it reads kisses and hugs), the world needs more of those, not yet more celebratory violence
tuesday would be good, or thursday, “Think” sounds OK- maybe quiet can be found there- the quieter the better, I remember once having a pizza with a friend on lafayette and the din was so bad we could not hear one another across a small table and my hearing is fine, though probably not after going there
the only  last minute cancellation would be related to return of my apple computer, which they will have had 11 days by then, on top of the 22 other days it’s been looked at
maybe I should have your number just in case
this is a serious situation and I have to act when the person I like whom I am dealing with says it’s ready, be there when he’s there
I lead a simple, non materialistic life, I write, I paint, I paint, I write, I make meals at home largely from whole foods which is less then one block away, I do exercises, pray three times a day, am in a state of deep focus- focus on the above and some beautiful maybe country home, being with an angel of a woman, warmly elegant and refined, who doesn’t continually yak,  and  spending endlesss time together loving each other
I am a typical aesthetic, sensual, spiritual piscean for whom beauty is a continual magnet, my home is reflective of this nature, cozy, charming, artistic, I like being in homes, mine or thers, though extremely adept and subtle socially avoid noise, crowds, if I have to be at an event I stay around the peripheries, where I can observe and learn and not be noticed, really see what is going on, it can be interesting
Actually, my ex-boyfriend signed all of his emails xoxo. When I made
friends with his ex-girlfriend (prior to me), she asked that I not
sign my emails with that…so I’ve stopped. Truly, one cannot
generalize about…most things.
There’s a lovely new-ish bar in my neighborhood also. It has a working fireplace and is usually quiet in the late afternoons/early evenings…if you’d prefer something truly cozy.
I have a feeling we will find each other…interesting but you do sound like you’re in a far different place/space than I am. While I am, indeed, yearning for a change of pace and, perhaps, lifestyle, I’m nowhere near the state of zen you profess to currently inhabit…
My number is 646-555-1234. Shall we shoot for Tuesday, unless your computer’s recovery interrupts?
A

he was unique, women use it all the time because women are constantly being “kissed” by everyone, including other women, on greeting, on saying goodbye- women are about salutory kisses and hugs
“profess” implies possession and self admiration, the way I described me is increasingly the only way I can deal with the world: by escaping  noise, crowds, sirens, subway screeches, by lighting candles and praying, by lying down and resting, refinding myself- it’s the only way I can get through a day- when I am in the apple store on b’way, where I’ve been so many times for the computer, I look at shlomo’s picture from my wallet to get myself through the experience of being there- there are all these nerdy, android like, nervous people in red shirts darting around and behind steve job’s glamor they are just another rule ridden, corporate iceberg- at least they have a store, gates and company distanced themselves completely from the human race, with call centers in india where people get paid farthings- as have many other companies, especially the broadband providers who screw people with ancient pop account technology and inflated costs versus france, japan and many other countries where costs are far less than here and technology far superior- why? because a federal agency and congressional “oversight” committe approved it- why? for some reason the word “payoff” seems to float into mind- corruption and lies- or to put it more positively, no truth
anyway, I think you are right about us, but you are obviously a truly fine person, I sense, generous and sweet in a world not exactly overridden by either- yes, smart, too, but that’s meaningless, smart people are a dime a dozen- kind is rare
so, friends, probably- will call re time-
I think I would be happier in a coffee type place than one for booze, honestly

Hello David,
I would like to politely cancel our plans to meet. It seems to me that it would be a waste of our time(s). While I can appreciate the concept of having people around me who I have absolutely nothing in common with, I would rather stay at home in my pajamas. I just don’t have the energy anymore to “collect” more new “friends.”
I hope you understand.
Abby
totally understand
I do think Abe Wilson’s (may dad’s attorney , long ago) point was correct: have different kinds of people in one’s life.
the tendency is to have people from the same profession
Well, given that I don’t have a profession, I don’t have friends in only one profession. I have friends in just about every imaginable walk of life: rich to poor, artists to bankers, ad execs and moms, religious people to agnostics and athiests, teenagers to 80-year-olds. I’m pretty lucky!
that cute exclamation mark again……! 

female emotion bursting forth

That was the last straw. The fact that he mentioned my use of exclamation points AGAIN, in that sexist context, was more than I could stomach. Then, searching through my Gmails to write about this, I discovered a few back-and-forths fromMay, 2008:

To plunge…
…or not to plunge.
Thank you for all the compliments. I like to think I write the way I talk…My friends all think I should be writing my memoirs. Maybe someday. Too busy living the now to write about the past…yet.
Well, zap me a photo and we’ll see, eh? I’m off to Austin (did I already tell you that?) on Wednesday but will be back a week later, celebrating my birthday at Continental (on the 28th) if you’d like to drop by!

(no subject)
Welcome home!
and happy birthday…
David

Thank you!
A
you’re welcome
I’m sure lots of love was imparted to you at your birthday bash
you have this lovable down to earthness
david
Does anyone else find this odd? I obviously forgot about our previous exchange, probably MOSTLY due to the fact that I never saw the guy’s face, so there wasn’t anything concrete to remember! Surely he must have recalled emailing me before? Or did my face blend in with the hundreds of other women he’s been emailing anonymously over the past three years? Either way, UGH! I sent him this email this morning. We’ll see what he says…
Okay, this is CREEPING ME OUT!
You obviously know me. And have known me for YEARS. WTF, dude?
I unearthed this email from you from way back in 2008. Creepy…
Who are you?
Abby

There’s No Place Like…

So I’m back from San Francisco, having weathered my sister’s move. I didn’t get to spend much time alone with her though she insists I was a help. I did a lot of unpacking and organizing, sure, but I didn’t get to offer much emotional support other than my mere presence. Perhaps that was all she needed.

I got to celebrate my dad’s birthday and Sophie’s. I went a week without spending any money. I got my shots for Africa from my sister’s concierge doctor. There were definitely some upsides.

Now I’m home, though it appears no one knows. Or cares. I woke up to a dusting of snow. The only person I spoke to today was a ConEd customer service rep. I didn’t leave the building. And if it hadn’t been for my workout and two loads of laundry, I wouldn’t have even left my apartment. I had a bagel for breakfast and canned soup for dinner. Not exactly the glamorous life.

Oh, and did I mention that it’s Friday night?