Daily Archives: November 11, 2010

The Worst Day On a Cruise Ship…

I gotta say that I’m a little tired of these cruise ship passengers and their whining. The news just reported that they were not, in fact, served Spam. They should’ve been served Spam! And enjoyed it! With this crappy economy and thousands of people out of work, are we really sitting in front of the evening news hearing about how these poor folks were stuck on a cruise ship? Wow, that is, like, soooo fucked up!

Imagine, being in the middle of the ocean on a cruise liner — pools, jacuzzis, running tracks, ballrooms, your own private BED, hello! — and then complaining about it! Sure, it may not have been the honeymoon of your dreams, but it sure beats the hell out of being in…hell, hundreds of other places! Ya ain’t in Haiti, motherfuckers! And you aren’t even in a slum. You’re on a fucking CRUISE SHIP!

The press is making it sound like “surviving” the ordeal is some sort of victory. Are they at ware? Under enemy fire? Are the being held hostage? At gunpoint? So what if the plumbing wasn’t working? I spend three months a year shitting in a port-a-pottie! Deal with it! You didn’t get those 24-hour buffets you expected? I can live on granola bars and SlimFast for a month!  And all you folks who don’t WANT that free cruise? I would be MORE than happy to take it off your hands for ya! Email me and I’ll give you my email address and PayPal account!

Sheesh! Show ME the Spam!